“Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done” (Luke 22:42, ESV)


The word that bridges

 the gap between

 my desire and

 the reality.


The word that

 increases Him

 and decreases me.


The unspoken



The word that provokes

 the countless

 “what ifs”

 that question my faith,

 expose my theology,

 shape my future,

 test my obedience,

 master my will.


When He spoke

 that precious word,

 it meant

 hurtful betrayal,

 the denial of justice,

 total abandonment,

 agonising pain,

 absolute darkness,

 cruel death.

I speak it hoping

 it will mean

 sunshine and roses,

 coffee and cake,

 ease and prosperity.


He spoke it knowing

 eternal life,

 full joy,

 unmerited righteousness,

 and perfect peace

 would follow the pain.

I speak it


 fearing the pain.

Excited for the


 but looking for

 a back road in.


Lord, I long

 for a heart

 like Yours,

 that spoke


 and left the


 to the



I long for the

 Servant’s heart,

 that says


 and means




 and doesn’t add


 or plead for a

 different route.


Father, let my


 be true abandonment,

 and Your will be


Whatever that looks like,

 tastes like,

 or costs.


Let it be

 the never-ending refrain

 in the valley of trouble,

 the exhale of trust

 on the


The complete

 laying down

 of all that is



The heart’s cry



 of my life.


Not my will,

 but Yours,

 be done.